While I’m always reluctant to pigeon-hole people, most assuredly myself, it’s pretty safe to say that I’m an introvert. Less so, perhaps, than I was in my earlier years – it’s a spectrum, after all – but still an introvert.

The classic rule of thumb applies: extroverts get their energy from being around other people, introverts such as myself recharge on own own.

As I’ve written about earlier, a persistent level of anxiety has become the norm for me due to today’s political turmoil. This is new and unusual for me; I’m typically a pretty laid-back person.

It’s also lead to something else perhaps even more unusual for me.

I find myself wanting to be around other people.

Read more

Today is apparently Random Acts of Kindness day. A day on which to make the world a somewhat more kind, positive place by performing a random act of kindness. Here’s Richard Branson’s list of 15 ideas.

It feels like we live in a particularly divided, divisive world of late, and focusing on things like this from time to time seems critically important – not just on one random day of the year, but every day.

It’s harder than it sounds.

Read more

“Lie” might be the most popular word in the English language right now. We see it thrown about like crazy in news reports, opinion and op-ed pieces, blog posts, social media posts, comments, and just about anywhere individuals and organizations express their opinions.

I’m coming to the conclusion that we’re using the word wrong. That, in the words of the immortal Ingio Montoya, “I do not think it means what you think it means.”

Or maybe it does, but we’re still using it incorrectly.

Read more

I’d gotten a new car and I wanted to explore some of its limits, as well as my own. I also wanted to do so in ways that are frowned upon when driving city streets.

The result was a day at the ProFormance Racing School. No, it wasn’t about racing, per se. It was more about putting myself and my car into situations in a safe environment so I could more safely handle similar situations out in the “real world”.

Read more

One of the things that mindfulness (to use the currently popular term) focuses on is what’s happening now. It’s really nothing more than another way to say “pay attention!” – to yourself, to the world around you, to what you’re thinking and feeling right now. “In the moment”, as they say.

Some time ago I was introduced to a couple of terms that help clarify the alternatives: re-living and pre-living.

Read more

“Keep this thought handy when you feel a fit of rage coming on—it isn’t manly to be enraged. Rather, gentleness and civility are more human, and therefore manlier. A real man doesn’t give way to anger and discontent, and such a person has strength, courage, and endurance—unlike the angry and complaining. The nearer a man comes to a calm mind, the closer he is to strength.” —MARCUS AURELIUS, MEDITATIONS,

I’ve never understood true anger or rage. It seems so … pointless.

Read more

I don’t generally get depressed easily, or when I do, I typically don’t stay in that state for very long.

This is different.

Honestly, since last November there’s been a backdrop of disbelief that’s slowly transitioned into a growing malaise. This last week it took a full-on leap into “WTF?!” territory.

Unfortunately, it’s also been impacting my ability to remain focused and productive, and I’m not sure what to do.

Read more

I’m thrilled at the turnout for yesterday’s (January 21, 2017) protest marches, I truly am.

I think that size as well as the diversity of locations around the planet exceeded all expectations. It was a welcome message at a time when I believe we are in serious need of hope.

But it leaves me hanging, with a question.

Now what?

Read more

I love technology, but there’s one problem I have yet to solve in a way that I consider “safe”.

I generally carry two devices with me: my mobile phone and a dedicated pocket voice recorder.

I’d rather only carry the first.

Read more

When my father fell and broke his hip in 2004 he’d just had his last cigarette, ending approximately 75 years of continuous and occasionally heavy smoking. His remaining years in a nursing home involved weaning off nicotine, followed by periodic searches for his cigarettes which he was convinced he had simply misplaced.

As he aged prior to dementia he would occasionally use his longevity as an indicator that smoking wasn’t really that bad for you.

I knew better than to argue with him.

But … that’s not how statistics and probability work.

Read more

With apologies to The Beatles, of course.

There’s a lot of discussion about autonomous cars in the news over the last year or so, and there’s plenty more on the horizon.

There are many, many roadblocks (so to speak) before self-driving cars become a reality. The sad part is that the technology won’t be biggest.

Read more

Perhaps more correctly, “put your money where you want your mind to be.”

Much has been made in recent months of the decline in journalism. Specifically, that journalism has responded to changes in our culture and information consumption by becoming less of source of information and more of a source of entertainment. Quoting Seth Godin’s blog this morning: “… newspapers won Pulitzer prizes for telling us things we didn’t want to hear. We’ve responded by not buying newspapers any more.” The implication is that if newspapers and other sources of information want to survive they need to tell what we want to hear.

That needs to change.

Read more

“It’s a disgrace in this life when the soul surrenders first while the body refuses to.” —MARCUS AURELIUS, MEDITATIONS, 6.29(*)

I’ll be honest, one of the reasons I began this writing exercise, and indeed, one of the reasons I do Ask Leo!, is to keep my mind as sharp and active as possible as I age. To force me to reflect, focus, think deeply, and perhaps as a side effect improve my writing skills along the way.

I’ve taken, and continue to take, steps to try to improve the chances my body will last, but there’s no doubting that as I age its capabilities will slowly wane.

I’d prefer my mind not follow the same path.

Read more

In the last many months we’ve heard the word “hate” used liberally, often to describe someone who happens to disagree with a position taken on polarizing issue.

We want simple answers to complex problems.

I’m all about the digital, but this is a case where trying to think in binary is seriously off the mark.

Read more

In the North American Numbering Plan, telephone numbers all consist of a 3 digit area code, a 3 digit office code (or exchange), and a 4 digit station number. When written the 3 components are typically separated by dashes, or in some cases periods – for example 206-965-9805.

To prevent real telephone numbers from appearing where they perhaps shouldn’t, phone numbers in the range 555-0100 through 0199 are reserved for “fictional” numbers. (Most assume that the entire 555 office code is so reserved, but apparently not.) What this means is that in books, movies or television when a phone number is presented it’s typically a 555 number.

Knowing this, the use of a 555 number immediately breaks suspension of disbelief for many. “Oh, yeah. We’re watching a movie.”

Read more

I don’t have to chase extraordinary moments to find happiness – it’s right in front of me if I’m paying attention and practicing gratitude. – Brene Brown

Inspired a bit by this post from Erika Napoletano (not the self-doubt part, the “where I’ve been focusing” part), I’ve realized that my writing has taken on not so much a dark tone, but a serious, contemplative, and occasionally “here’s what’s wrong with the world” kind of tone. While those are important perspectives, and I’ll certainly return to them, I also need to bring balance to my thinking.

Heck, gratitude is what part of this exercise is all about.

Read more

“If you grew up where they grew up, and you were taught what they were taught, you would believe what they believe” – Anon⁽¹⁾

I’ve used this quote before. Back then I said “If more people understood and accepted that, fewer people would die before their time.”

For some reason in recent weeks my thoughts have been returning to that quote.

Read more

“The greatest enemy of knowledge is not ignorance, it is the illusion of knowledge.”⁽¹⁾

The first step to solving any problem is recognizing there’s a problem to be solved. It’s true for everything from personal issues to the trivial problems of daily living to the gigantic questions of our time. You can’t fix a problem you don’t know you have.

Particularly of late, knowledge itself – or rather the illusion of knowledge – is a problem.

Read more