Chuckling in the MRI
I don’t let that get in the way of doing it poorly, anyway, for the past 17+ years. My take is that the only truly “bad” meditation is the one that didn’t happen. Even then, that’s being unnecessarily judgmental, but there we are.
One of the techniques I use when meditating is to recite a specific “gatha” or short verse to myself. This comes from Thich Nhat Hanh’s book Present Moment Wonderful Moment: 52 Inspirational Cards and a Companion Book.
Breathing in, I know I’m breathing in.
Breathing out, I know I’m breathing out.
As the in-breath grows deep, the out-breath grows slow.
Breathing in makes me calm. Breathing out brings me ease.
With the in-breath, I smile. With the out-breath, I release.
Breathing in, there is only the present moment.
Breathing out, it is a wonderful moment.
Now, that’s a mouthful, and I don’t have it memorized, but there’s a very convenient summary that runs in my head all the time.
In, Out.
Deep, Slow.
Calm, Ease.
Smile, Release.
Present Moment, Wonderful Moment.
For reasons I’ll never fully understand, I’d long envisioned wanting to be able to meditate/calm myself while in a hospital bed. Fair enough, and indeed, it was a useful technique throughout my adventure.
But then there was the MRI. An unexpected 30 minutes of “Are you claustrophobic?” followed by “Well, I guess I am now.”
So of course I’m in it, meditating hard (OK, ok, that’s NOT a thing, but it makes a point), running through the gatha when I reach
Present Moment, Wonderful Moment.
I seriously chuckle. While in the MRI. “Wonderful moment,” my ass.
Seriously?
And yet, as I reflected on the situation, I realized that it truly was a wonderful moment. I had injured myself, there is no doubt, but consider all the things that happened immediately thereafter.
- Rapid emergency care.
- Transport to precisely the correct hospital for what was to come.
- Friends and family rallying.
- This amazing piece of technology was examining my spine to determine exactly what had happened.
- That a diagnosis and plan would be forthcoming.
- That I was in exactly the right place to execute that plan, whatever it might turn out to be.
Yes. That moment, right there, was indeed wonderful.
I have no idea if my chuckle was out loud, but I kinda hope it was, and that the techs heard it.
In my early days, I had learned to meditate by imagining a candle with a flame that I focused my concentration upon. This worked well for me, and when my soon-to-be husband (now of fifty-three years) and I began seeing each other regularly, I tried to help him learn to meditate. I explained the candle and its being the point of focus. We tried meditating together for a while, with him usually dropping out early in our sessions. When I was trying to understand the problems he was having, he said that, in his mind, he kept seeing people walking between him and his (imaginary) candle and disrupting his focus!! Wow! I didn’t know what to say to that. Unfortunately, I hadn’t advanced sufficiently to know how to help him right then. Now, I think that some affirmations, mantras, or your gathas might have worked well for him at that time. We learn as we grow. I’m so glad that you’re recovering and doing well. Like all of your followers, I was very, very sorry to learn about your accident. It’s something that we all worry about more, the older we get. As bad as your experience was, it does sound like you were in the right place, with the right facilities, and all of your nearby family and friends to help you out. Prayers coming in from me and everyone else who values you may be helping, at least a little, we all hope. 🙂
Three Words from a claustrophobic reader: Full Sedation MRI.
Next time: better living through chemistry.