I don’t generally get depressed easily, or when I do, I typically don’t stay in that state for very long.
This is different.
Unfortunately, it’s also been impacting my ability to remain focused and productive, and I’m not sure what to do.
In addition to not depressing easily, I also typically don’t panic. My mind rarely goes to the more extreme possibilities when faced with any particular situation, event, or potential crisis.
I am shocked and saddened by the actions of our government. And, indeed, I find myself deeply troubled where fears of things like fascism, nuclear war, economic collapse – while not likely – have actually entered the realm of possible. To my shock and sadness add an undercurrent of actual, honest, fear.
That there are people who actually, honestly, believe we have the right and proper leadership, only adds to that fear.
When it comes to the state of the world, to the state of politics, to the state of our leadership, I’m lost, I’m frustrated, I’m stuck, I’m a little afraid, and I don’t know what to do about it.
How to #StayOutraged Without Losing Your Mind helped some. But it’s not enough. It’s difficult to disconnect – even for a short period of time – without the guilty feeling like I ought to be doing something. That I can’t just let this be, even for a short time. We can’t let what’s going on right now become the new “normal”.
And yet I have no idea what that “something” I ought to be doing should be, thus taking me back to my spiral of frustration.
To quote the late Paul Harvey, “You get the government you deserve.” What did we do to deserve this?
I take some solace in the fact that I know I’m not alone. Indeed, I write this in part to perhaps let others in the same situation understand exactly that. And perhaps to hear from them as well.
Maybe it’ll all blow over. Maybe the next two, four or eight years will see change – as would be expected – without the potential calamities that so many fear.
We can hope.
But while we hope, we fear.
Don’t be surprised if I pull my head inside my shell a little more often, and for longer periods of time. Right now it’s the only way I know to avoid despair (though writing about it helps, a little).